Photograph by Simon Berger via Unsplash

A key element of pastoral ministry is to respect people and the context where you serve. I learned some lessons about this in my first ministry setting. I was the interim pastor of Primera Iglesia Bautista. It was a bilingual (Spanish-English) church in San Jose, California. I was not a trained interim — those came later. I was 26. I spoke some Spanish, but I was far from fluent. They were patient with me, and I improved over the year I was there. I experienced a lot of firsts that year. My first baptism. My first time serving communion on my own. The first Christmas Eve service I planned was an education. 

Christmas Eve happened a few months after I started. I was anxious about the service. I didn’t have to worry. Church members had plenty of opinions about what we should do. As far as they were concerned, we would do what they always did. One man always sang a secular Christmas song in his nightclub style. I didn’t think that was appropriate. However, I learned my plan to take the song out was not going to fly. They wanted a choir for the service. I volunteered to direct. I was just a singer, not a choir director, but they could have a choir like they always did. 

And we had to have a pageant. The angels were to be two little boys, ages 4 and 5. They were the opposite of angelic when they were in church week to week.

I thought, this is going to be a disaster. My worship training told me a service needs coherence. But I had to let go of the desire to control things.

As you might predict, the service was beautiful. The little angel boys in their white robes were — angels, starry-eyed and reverent. Everyone sighed. The “nightclub” song was touching. The choir sounded fine. I didn’t blow too many brain cells from stress. And people were touched by the service. What a lesson for a young pastor. 

Over the years, I learned more fully that people need to connect with worship emotionally. That means leaders must include words, rituals, and practices people recognize. Songs they know and can sing wholeheartedly. There’s more to it, of course. Leadership means encouraging people to grow. That includes helping people learn new songs and experience new worship practices. Over time, you will offer a challenge to some new ways of being in ministry together. However, it’s important to connect before you challenge too much. 

You may think you know best for a congregation, whether about worship or other parts of ministry. Maybe you do, in theory. You do bring training and experience that are a gift to them. However, it’s just as important to bring your curiosity. Who are these people? What do they love? What’s their history? What is meaningful to them, in worship and elsewhere? They will sense that you are genuinely interested in them. Context matters. Your connection with them matters, on Christmas Eve and all year long.